How Engaging in Positive Self talk can change your Life.
If we only understood the power of our thoughts and how they influence our lives.
Most people when asked would disagree that their world is created by their own inner self talk. The good news is that regardless of any challenges you are facing right now you can make a change. With a little discipline and practice some simple changes can completely change your life.
You are not your story!
We all do it, day in day out… that internal dialogue we all constantly chat with ourselves.
Most of the time this “chatting” is not very constructive and tends to be negative. Self talk
is your ego’s way of keeping you where you are.. It does not like change.
I am sure you can recall some self talk right now, I can almost guarantee it is negative,
full of worry and doubt that leaves you feeling worried, demotivated and at a place where
change is almost impossible to achieve.
Your thoughts are made up of words which normally result in false beliefs, I am not good
enough, I will fail, I will never be thin, I will never get the partner if my dreams….. I am sure
you can relate to this on some level. This behaviour pattern will keep you stuck and avoiding
any form of growth and dreams.
The battle between your thoughts and what you want from life are tough.
Your inner voice is capable of telling you so many horrible things about yourself, and for
the most part you believe every single word it says. You become trapped in your own
head, disempowered and feeling that sense of I cannot achieve, I do not deserve, this is
my lot in life just accept it and get on with it.
You are not your thoughts!
Thoughts are just that…. thoughts. Before you created them they simply did not exist. So
why do we get so hung up on our thoughts? We believe them as if the problems and
nightmares we have created in thought are stood right in front of us. We cannot control
thought and despite popular belief we cannot only think positive thoughts.
Instead how about understanding these thoughts for what they are….just thoughts. If a
thought pops into your head that does not serve a positive intention just wave it through,
do not get caught up in dialogue with it. So next time the inner voice serves up “ You will
never be thin, have that job, have that home, be loved” just wave that thought through
and continue with your day. It is only when we engage with these thoughts we begin to
believe they are true.
Why am I telling you all this?
Once you discover that you are not your thoughts things will start to change. I want you
to start practicing and being aware of your thoughts and differentiating between the true
you and your ego self.
At first it seems difficult acknowledging your thoughts but like anything else in life with a
bit of practice you will get better. If you tell yourself you can or you tell yourself you can’t
you’re probably right …..
Here are some tips to help control negative self-talk:
- Practice being aware of the thoughts that are going on in your head and any self
talk that’s going on. Dedicate sometime to getting better at this and remember
you’re only ever one thought away from being ok.
- Try and find 10-15 minutes everyday where you can sit quietly with no
distractions, just close your eyes focus on your breathing and try and quieten
things down. In time you will learn how to quieten your mind so that you can start
listening to your own voice, noticing the difference between the ‘your voice, your
soul, your wisdom’ and ‘the noisy unhelpful ego voice’.
- Accept that your negative self-talk will happen but you do not have to engage with
it and be affected by it.
- Your inner voice will tell you stories like “This will never work”, “We don’t have
time for this”……….Don’t get drawn into this as your ego likes to resist change,
just trust the process and start practicing.
- In order to live a happy and fulfilled life and be able to deal with the challenges
and stress life will present at times, teaching your ego that you will not engage in
self doubt and negative dialogue will help you lead a much happier life.
I am always happy to answer any questions or comments you may have.